Pairings: Hiroki/Akihiko (sort of), Egoist
Wordcount: 139 + 108 + 128
Challenge: poison, tongue, summer rain, beach, thirst
It's been very quiet here lately! I wrote a miniature suite of three drabbles for five different challenges - I hope I'm not breaking any rules...
No one can live like this, Hiroki thinks as he watches Akihiko stare into space, present but absent.
Even though they spend time together they're rarely in the same place – Hiroki is by Akihiko's side, completely focused, but Akihiko is only there in body. His mind, his thoughts are somewhere else, with someone else.
I can't stand it! Hiroki screams silently. I love you! You could at least look at me!
But it wouldn’t make anything better, because Akihiko still wouldn’t see.
Hiroki clenches his fists and swallows, carefully not looking at the graceful curve of Akihiko's neck or the tiny flutter of the pulse point, carefully not imagining what it would feel like under his tongue.
His love for Akihiko is like poison, a slow-acting poison moving sluggishly through his veins. He has yet to find an antidote.
Setting: Long, empty beach. It’s raining. One lonely figure becomes visible in the distance. Slouching. Head bent, hands in pockets, shoulders hunched against the rain.
Camera zooms in: Hiroki walks slowly. Camera can't catch his eyes. Impossible to tell whether the drops trickling down his face are just rain or mixed with tears.
Sound: Waves, seagulls, distant traffic, faint whisper of footsteps in sand. Hiroki mumbles something; indistinguishable. (You need to run the clip again with the volume up.)
Colours: Leaden grey, greenish grey, dull gold. Colour of the soul: Muddy. Like when you mixed all the watercolours in the box when you were a kid.
Panting, Nowaki rolls off Hiroki and on to his back. He looks up at the ceiling, smiling, and Hiroki looks at him, incredulous.
You found me in darkness and brought me into the light.
That's how it feels. He can't say so to Nowaki, it's too cheesy, but he can think the phrase and keep it inside him like a small, radiant sun.
Nowaki turns his head to meet Hiroki's eyes, still smiling. Everything falls in place. This very moment, everything is right.
Nowaki is like the answer to an unspoken question, a cure for a disease Hiroki never knew he had contracted, a clear well whose water quenches a thirst he couldn't identify.
Hiroki will never tell him this, but somehow he is sure Nowaki will know.